Saturday, March 12, 2011

Gas pains that Rolaids won't touch

The price of gas at the pumps is giving us collective gas pains that bathing in a sea of Alka Seltzer wouldn't even cure.

You see, the astronomical price of gasoline in America is a symptom of the problem, and not the bigger problem.

The bigger problem is that our government is run, manipulated, bullied and influenced by everyone except for the voters who put their butts in office.

Everyone from the Sierra Club to PETA to Exxon Mobil to the homeless to the transgender freaks have their own lobbyists, all of whom have suitcases full of cash and pockets full of perks to bribe our elected prostitutes with.

And bribe they do.

And then there are the taxes per gallon that each state charges. Not surprising, California and New York--the two bastions of socialism--lead the way in charging the most draconian taxes per gallon of gasoline.

Right here in Texas, we have more than enough oil wells already drilled and capped off to sustain ourselves for decades to come--so long as we don't sell it to too many other states. But, our neighbors all around us also have plenty of oil already drilled and capped off. So do our further reaching neighbors to the west and northwest, and especially our big cousin, Alaska.

Instead, our elected whores continue to pimp us out to the OPEC thugs, including that murderous, dick-tater in Venezuela, Hugo Chavez.

The problems with high prices at the pump go beyond just giving us a collective pain in the ass--where we carry our wallets. When gas prices go up, we tend to drive less and only to necessary places like work. That means stay-at-home vacations which means hotels and motels lose business. So do the roadside restaurants who are used to collecting money from traveling tourists. The souvenir hawkers and tour guides lose money. And so do the gas stations at the tourist destinations.

When gas prices go up, so do airline tickets. American Airlines just announced today they were having to raise ticket prices by a minimum of $10 per trip in an effort to try and offset rising oil prices. Remember: airlines also charge you $25 to $35 per bag, claiming the extra weight causes the airplane to use additional fuel.

I've been raising hell with airlines to charge fat/obese people extra for years, but that's another subject.

Diesel prices are the highest of all, and most farm tractors that I'm familiar with operate on diesel. So do the eighteen-wheelers that transport our goods. So do most of the cargo ships that haul trade goods around the world.

It's ridiculous that a handful of raghead sons of bitches can hold the world hostage simply by manipulating how much oil they pump and sell, and for how much.

I have an equitable solution.

You can't grow jackshit in Sand Land--aka Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Libya, Iran, Iraq, UAE and other desert wasteland oil depositories.

So how about charging the ragheads the same price for a bushel of wheat as they do for a barrel of crude? Rice? hey, a gallon-container of rice for the same price as a gallon of diesel.

Deal is, we can walk places if we have to, but the Saudis and other oil sheiks have to eat, and last I read, crude oil is not part of the four food groups.

In the meantime, let's start tapping into our own deposits right here in North America and tell the OPEC assholes to go to hell.

To the elected folks in Washington: We put you there this past 2010 to do what is right and to do our bidding. We can damn sure remove you in 2012 if you don't hold up to your end of the deal.

To the Republican majority: Tell that sonofabitch Obama to kiss our ass and go straight to hell and get us the legislative approval needed to start drilling in ANWR ASAP. You have the majority in the House. Get the damned ball rolling. Now.

No more excuses.

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