Tuesday, April 12, 2011

We need to start punching out lawyers

An old military pal of mine once opined that almost every ill and wrong and problem that we have in this nation can be traced back to how damn many lawyers we have.

They've become, he noted, the suburbanite wussy's version of a frontiersman's six-gun.

I agree.

©Marty Bucella www.martybucella.com

Some ten years or so ago, I had a dispute with a neighbor over something or the other. The neighbor was an asshole from somewhere up north and "couldn't wait to get the hell out of Texas." We couldn't wait for him to get the hell out, either.

One thing led to another and I'm pretty sure I called him an asshole or prick or SOB or something. Couple days later, I get this attorney who shows up in my office, all hot and bothered about me "threatening his client."

Long story short, I explained to the lawyer it was a neighborhood dispute involving his client and the rest of the cul-de-sac. Lawyer said it didn't matter and he was going to hold me responsible for "frightening" his client with my calling him an asshole.

I told the lawyer I was getting ready to kick his ass not only out of my office, but right off the effing planet. Lawyer smirked and said he'd "see me jailed and then sue me."

I smirked right back and told lawyer that maybe so, maybe so, but HE'D still be eating food made in a blender and sucking it through a straw for the next twelve months, and that his (expletive deleted) nose would never heal straight, and that if the lawyer was stupid enough to threaten me AGAIN with such a frivolous threat, I'd do MORE damage the next time I caught up with him.

As I walked him to the elevator, I had one hand on the crux of his neck and collar bone, and was shaking his other hand--and crushing it as hard as I could to get my previous point across.

Result? No lawsuit. Obnoxious neighbor said nothing further to any of us. Never heard from said lawyer again.

Was I serious about my threat? You're damned right I was.

The problem with lawyers is that so many of them grow up to be judges, and inevitably, some of those judges end up becoming federal judges, or worse, appellate judges, or even worse than that, Supreme Court justices.

Seems the higher they rise, much like a turd in a toilet bowl, the more their decisions tend to stink up the entire country. I give you the recent bunch of turds from the Ninth Circuis Court in the People's Republic of Kalifornia as further evidence.

Arizona Immigration Law: Enforcement Blocked by Circuit Court

I find myself getting angrier by the day the way this nation is going. Bad enough under Bush, but under this Kenyan imposter, we're plummeting faster than the value of our dollar with the ChiComs.

Arizona got sick and tired of the feds not doing their job; not following the law; not even enforcing the law. So Arizona told Uncle Sam to kiss its sovereign ass, and wrote, drafted and passed a law telling Arizona lawmen to begin doing what the useless feds refuse to do.

Liberals had a conniption. The Kenyan imposter had a coronary and actually urged the rest of the country to boycott Arizona. Now, what kind of a shit-stain for a president would do that--refuse to enforce laws that would help border states, then urge the rest of the nation to boycott those states who are trying to protect themselves because the useless-ass feds REFUSE to do it?

Only someone of the fraudulent ilk of the Kenyan imposter, who by the way, is a lawyer. Damn near every blood-sucking politician in Washington is not just a lawyer, but a rich lawyer.

Does that tell you anything about the law profession as we know it today?

Everytime I turn around, I'm hearing about lawyer this, lawyer that. How so and so has had to hire a lawyer. How lawyers for the unions in Wisconsin have filed this suit or that. How lawyers for the illegals have filed a suit against this or that. How lawyers for child rapists and dog-killers and pampered professional sports figures are bemoaning the unfair treatment their clients receive.

Screw lawyers. Man up, America! We need to man up to our responsibilities and doing what's right. Reach down and try to locate your testicles and ovaries. There was a time when we only needed a handful of lawyers--and that was to conduct our criminal courts. We need to go back to that time.

In the meantime, where the hell are all the lawyers raising hell with the government to make them ENFORCE the laws that Arizona is trying to do?

Seems to me that most lawyers are on the wrong side of the law. Maybe if we started punching more of them out, and hard enough to put some real fear into them, we might get rid of some of this crap and could get back into the business of being the United States of America rather than a spawning field for more attorneys.

I expect to hear from some damned lawyer threatening me over my opinion. My advice? Best leave me alone. I'm fed up and I've had enough.

And I'm far from alone with that attitude.


Don F said...

Remember: lawyers exist only to protect you from other lawyers.


An Ordinary American said...

Yep, it's a vicious cycle all right. Kinda like which came first, the chicken or the egg?

My solution is to fry the chicken and scramble the eggs--then it doesn't matter.